motivation

I was reading Dooce’s comment that people send her hatemail, telling her they disagree with something she said or did. I just don’t get it. What is their motivation? They can’t seriously think she will change because they send her an email. So if the situation can’t be changed, why criticise it? Now before my husband writes me, let it be known that I do criticise him on occasion. But there, I hope that my constructive comments (ahem) will indeed effect some change. We have a connexion, we are connected, we have agreed to work together to make our lives better. So if I want him to do something differently to make my life better, I tell him. But a total stranger? Whose life does not impact on yours?

My mother used to say that people would do things to get a rise out of other people and therefore the best thing to do was to not react at all. So maybe those hate emailers are trying to get a reaction from Dooce. But that doesn’t make sense either because she doesn’t react where they can see it. Do they get some kind of warped satisfaction knowing that their emails might possibly elicit a reaction even though they will never know? Maybe it’s like practical jokers who do things for which they will never see the results.

On the other hand, while I was pondering why practical jokers do these things, I thought about people who do random acts of kindness. Or what about when I pick up garbage or try to return a lost item, even though I know no one will ever know? People who do good things sometimes do them even though there will be no reaction. So it must be that people do things from which they derive satisfaction all on their own and in some people, the act involves being mean and in others, the act is good. Interesting.